Ralphie May performed at FAU on Wednesday, Oct. 24 and by the time the auditorium doors opened, the lines of students were out the main doors of the union.
By 8:30 p.m., the auditorium —which has 2,400 seats — was filled. DJ Scopes got students into the party mood as FAU’s mascot, Owlsley, “Walked it out” and did the “Stanky leg” up on stage, getting everyone excited for May.
After receiving a big cheer from the students and dancing on stage to DJ Scopes’ music, May opened his act by explaining why he couldn’t make it last year.
Last year, May got sick with pneumonia, which later caused a blood clot in his lungs. He told the audience that doctors had given him a 10 percent chance of living.
Even being so close to death, May’s thoughts were all about the disappointed students at FAU. May said he told the doctors, “Get me out of here, I got a show to do.” This lead to many “Aww’s” and a big round of applause from the audience.
With his backstory out of the way, May began the act many students had waited a year to see.
“I’ve been a fan of Ralphie May for years,” said Bryce Phillips, a freshman biology major. “I used to listen to him on the radio with my dad a lot, so to get to see him was really nice.”
It didn’t take long for May to start talking about sex. It was all about the sex, pussy and big girl sex. Some of his comments were a bit awkward but still had students laughing in their seats.
Setting up a joke about the sounds women make when they have sex, May said, “The only honest noise a woman makes in bed is…,” to which a female audience member yelled out a high pitched “Ah!”
The whole auditorium just busted out laughing and left May stunned on stage.
“I got a half boner,” May said. “I’ll be at the Renaissance Hotel.”
Other then that one incident, much of May’s act seemed really repetitive and awkward. Some of his jokes, like the “sex tsunami,” being balls deep in a woman, and the different sizes of dicks and vaginas, felt like they were dragged on for the chuckles.
“I didn’t watch all of it but I feel like Ralphie May could have been a little better,” said sophomore psychology major Caileigh Mills. “I’ve seen him at his best on TV, but it was still funny.”
Later in the evening, students started leaving in small groups though most of the auditorium remained full until the very end.
May had two performers open up for him. The first comedian to perform was Miami native, Malik Sanon. “I’m the only one in my family to finish college,” Sanon said.
“I didn’t graduate, I just finished. I couldn’t find parking that day.”
Sanon had a few college anecdotes about how hard it was to write a term paper when your roommate was having sex. His motto for college is, “Better to cheat than repeat.”
Sanon got positive reactions from the crowd. Though some of his jokes about sex and “practicing your pulling out every morning” were a bit crude, he kept his overall show pretty clean and funny.
“I liked the black guy [Sanon] because he was mainly freestyle,” said freshman and civil engineering major Javonte Wilkerson. “He didn’t have that much written material but he was really funny.”
“What’s up fuckers?” comedian Juan Villareal asked the crowd before his set.
Getting little reaction in the beginning of his act, Villareal dropped the overused “fuck’s” and “fucker’s,” and tried to smooth things over.
“I like to have fun and talk a lot,” Villareal said. “So please don’t be offended by what I say.”
The crowd warmed up to Villareal as he talked about his problems with being an adult and trying to learn how to text.
“I don’t care what you send me,” Villareal said. “I’ll be the one who sends you a ‘K.’”
Another form of technology that Villareal spoke about having problems with was his GPS. He described one time when Jill, the GPS woman, started talking to him. “Because I’m high I start talking back,” he said.
For the most part, Villareal’s act was clean and funny, but he did mention the importance of keeping your private area clean for both men and ladies. Clean dicks and shaved pussies may not have been the classiest topic, but it sure got the room laughing.
Yet that was nothing compared to when headliner Ralphie May took the stage.
May ended his show by demonstrating how to finger bang a girl to the greatest hits of the ‘80s. He even got the crowd to join him in singing “Livin’ on a Prayer” by Bon Jovi.
Program Board Director Lexi Rosario said bringing May back was worth it because last year there were a lot of disappointed students. This year they got what they wanted.
“Now that we’ve done a ton of events, everything was run very smoothly,” Rosario said. “The turnout was really good. It seemed like everybody had a really good time and I had a good time.”
May’s act might have been uncomfortable for some, but in all, students were pleased to see him here at FAU alive and healthy. He received a standing ovation from the crowd as he walked off stage.
“It was definitely worth waiting for because he’s a famous comedian and I would like to see him all the time,” said Caileigh Mills. “I’m glad he came and I’m glad he supported FAU.”